Sunday 29 July 2012

open letter to NBC




Dear American Friends at NBC

We know it is hard for you to consider that there is a world outside the USA, and harder still to believe that it matters. But every once in a while, give it a try. The opening of an Olympic Games, for example, would be a perfect opportunity for you to just ever so slightly widen your horizon.

Because imagine it had happened the other way round: 


New York wins the bid to host the Olympic Games. The New York Organising Committee (probably spelling itself with a 'z'; we forgive you for that) appoints a director who may not be to everyone's taste but who is highly respected in your country and has many admirers across the world, say Stephen Spielberg, to direct the Opening Ceremony. He does so and includes in the ceremony a segment to honour the victims of 9/11. 


And now the BBC (that's our British Broadcasting Corporation, in case you wonder) decides: 'Actually, that slow moment there, where nothing really happens except somebody's singing a hymn and there are some dancers doing their thing, and pictures of some dead people are shown, that's just some boring stuff about a bunch of murdered Americans and not really relevant to our British audience, we'll cut to an interview with Rebecca Adlington instead'. 


The more sensitive among you might find this a touch upsetting. But rather than apologise, imagine now the BBC turning around, saying: 'You know what, it's a credit to this "producer" [by which they mean the director] that we only had to cut such a small bit. Well done, Mr Spielberg, you nearly managed to give us exactly what we think makes a for good Opening Ceremony.' 


Now do you see how preposterous that is? And how wrong? Because of course 9/11 affects people all over the world. Just as 7/7 does. It's only the order of magnitude that's different. And that isn't even the point. The point is that anyone, anywhere can relate to a moment of reflection for fellow human beings who cannot be with us when we celebrate. And it is not for you to decide what's relevant to this ceremony, or the people watching it, and what isn't. That's not good programming, that's just arrogance.  


So please do the decent thing and apologise. To Danny Boyle, to the artists and performers, to London, to everyone who has lost friends, family, loved ones anywhere in the world who was being remembered and honoured in the 'dull bit' that you felt would best be replaced by an interview with Michael Phelps, charming man though he may be (I don't know him personally, and I have no cavil with him). 

And please: try not to be so unbelievably patronising. As you can tell from reading this letter, it's deeply annoying. And whether you think we matter or not, we - the 6.7 billion or so people in the world who are not Americans - exist and your attitude on an occasion like this is just breathtakingly offensive to us; and really quite insulting to your 'American audience' too: because not only will you find that many people living in your country are really from somewhere else, you're also implying that all Americans are as ignorant and crass as you are. And we all know for a fact that that's not the case. So even if you can't bring yourself to give us a second thought, at least show your own audience some respect.

In the Olympic Spirit, from London
Sebastian Michael


The cut segment (not best quality - if you know of a better clip, please let me know)



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Friday 27 July 2012

wear charity t-shirts and ask for rivella


It started with Visa. 


Visa, in their wisdom decided that the best way to impress people and gain their trust was to force them to get one of their cards. No choice. If you want Olympic tickets, you have to use Visa. (If you can get tickets that is, but that's another story...)


Then came McDonald's. McDonald's thought it was fair enough and a good advertisement for their dubious fare to prohibit other food outlets on the Olympic park from selling chips. Chips, people! Staple of British staples. Not allowed. They finally, reluctantly, and no more than partly, relented, and that only because disgruntled staff and volunteers working on the site gave caterers grief for refusing to serve them.

Next Seb Coe, chief honcho of London 2012 told us we couldn't get into an Olympic venue wearing a T-Shirt if it had the logo of Coca-Cola arch rival Pepsi on it. Why anyone would want to wear any piece of clothing that is either Coke or Pepsi branded is beyond me, and people around him have since stepped down a notch and 'clarified' the situation, but the thinking behind what he said stands. (You yourself are allowed a non-sponsor T-Shirt. You and your mates are not, is what it boils down to: it's about ambush marketing. But where do you draw the line?)

And then we have the already legendary 286 strong brand police that's traipsing around London in the summer of 2012, taking down Olympic Rings shaped bagels in cornershop bakeries and making pub landlords wipe out boards that have words like 'gold', 'silver', 'bronze', 'summer' or 'London' and '2012' on it.

All of this in the name of corporate sponsorship. Which covers, wait for it, 2% of the cost of the Games (that's according to Newsnight). Two percent. Not twenty. Not a third of the cost or half of it. Two pence in the pound. 


Why do we stand for this nonsense? Is it, in any way, acceptable?

Of course it isn't.

If any of this happened under a communist regime or in a crackpot dictatorship, we would think these people crazy and demand that somebody put a stop to it.


So why are brands behaving like crackpot dictators? Because they have become too powerful. And like anyone who is too powerful, they are afraid. They are afraid of losing their grip, they are afraid that we might do what we like instead of what they tell us to do, they are afraid that we do what we think is right, what is good for us, our communities, for society as a whole and for the planet. Instead of what's good for them.


If they tell you that with their sponsorship they're really doing you a favour because they are making this impossible thing possible, don't believe a word. They're doing themselves a favour. Any benefit that goes to anybody else is part of a simple cost-yield calculation. Nothing about their involvement with the Olympics is in your interest, everything is in theirs.

In your interest is having a variety of credit and payment cards and payment options from as wide a range of providers as possible (maybe even some ethical ones), so you are never dependent on one, are able to spread your costs, and free to actually take advantage of market forces. It is in their interest that you only use theirs.

In your interest is to go for the best and healthiest chips on site, it is in their interest that you only eat theirs.

In your interest is to bring your own favourite drink or some water, it is in their interest that you only buy theirs.

I'm not, by the way, suggesting sponsorship is inherently bad; I am not principally against it. But there has to be some sort of sanity about it, and some perspective. And also we should be able to expect to have upheld for us the baseline freedom of choice that the market economy purports to provide.

Clearly, there isn't going to be a revolution overnight in which we throw off the shackles of corporate coercion, but that doesn't mean we have to put up with this erosion of our rights in silence.

We can make a statement. So, when you go to the Games, wear a charity T-shirt. Doesn't matter which charity, just one you like. See if they stop you. If they do, go topless. If they don't let you do that, streak. Take pictures, take video, go viral.

Bring as much water to the venue as you dare. You're allowed 100ml. (It's absurd, I know. Never in my life did I think I would ever write the sentence: "You're allowed 100ml", referring to water. But that's corporate reality.) Have a condition. Insist you need your water for your medication. See if they challenge you. Faint if they do. And take an empty water bottle. The Olympic website on its list of prohibited and restricted items specifically allows this and says that venues have water fountains. Test this to the limit.

And wherever you go, ask for Rivella. Rivella is a family-owned business that has been making the most popular Swiss soft drink for decades. The Swiss are neutral and fiercely independent. Take a leaf out of their book and cock a snook at Coke. Nobody will stock it, so say that in that case you'll have a glass of tap water. If they don't serve you, retch, and then faint.

Share the love, be friendly, enjoy the Games, and take them back, these Games: they're yours.


(I have no connection with Rivella and I'm not related to the Barth family who own it. I just love it. But then I am Swiss. And they are an 'official partner' of the Swiss Olympic team. Which is nice of them and a little ironic, in a good way, I hope. You can get it in the UK from Genorel Soft Drinks. I'm not connected with them either and I don't get commission. The shirt in the picture above is from Amnesty International. I support Amnesty International. I also endorse Ben Cohen's Standup Foundation against bullying. You do whatever you know is right.)


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